Ashley Madison and YouGov reveal that many consider the date a commercial move, with a need for greater inclusion.
O Ashley Madison, the world’s leading extramarital relationship website, wants to show that there is a universe of possibilities beyond monogamous relationships. To this end, the platform brought studies that show how society and companies can be even more comprehensive when it comes to advertising aimed at June 12th.
According to a survey of its members, 57% say they do not think Valentine’s Day advertisements accurately reflect the many types of modern relationships, such as open relationships, polyamory, etc. In a separate survey, commissioned by the site for the YouGovit was revealed that 42% have the same opinion.
“Many couples feel that a more open style of monogamy is better suited to their needs. Open monogamy means couples have a primary or core relationship as well as a flexible or fluid relationship arrangement. This may seem revolutionary to some, but for many it’s natural to outsource our needs and have multiple relationships. We have several friends, children, relatives and co-workers. Expanding our romantic partners might also make sense,” said Tammy Nelson, author of Open Monogamy.
Consistent with Ashley Madison’s 2024 trends report, this latest research suggests there is a growing desire for more acceptance in society for non-monogamous relationships. In fact, 82% of members surveyed say it is possible to love more than one person.
Given this, the current format of Valentine’s Day, which favors single-partner relationships, is not perceived as inclusive of those in non-monogamous relationships. It makes sense, then, that 31% of Ashley Madison members indicate that they do not celebrate Valentine’s Day at all, with 58% of members believing that the holiday is nothing more than a money-making ploy.
Similarly, 42% of respondents to the YouGov study say they do not celebrate Valentine’s Day and that the date means nothing to them, with 46% of women indicating a stronger dislike of the celebration compared to 38% of men. Another 19% consider it to be a manufactured day when they feel the need to spend money (20% of men versus 17% of women). Interestingly, across all locations surveyed, women are less likely to celebrate Valentine’s Day than men.
Of the Ashley Madison members who celebrate, 56% celebrate because they have to. A ranking of how users celebrate Valentine’s Day is as follows:
Romantic dinner (36%)
Exchange of gifts/flowers (34%)
Sex (31%)
Travel with partner(s) (8%)
Meeting at the spa (5%)
When asked what could be done to replace Valentine’s Day, the women of Ashley Madison have a solution: Valentine’s Week. For 40% of female respondents, the idea is to extend the celebration to alleviate the pressure of ‘a special day’, which provides more celebration opportunities for non-monogamous couples. This option would be ideal for the 31% of respondents who said they also buy Valentine’s Day gifts for their secondary partner.
Ashley Madison members who buy gifts tend to spend an equal amount ($85 to $120) on both their primary and secondary partner (25% vs. 22%, respectively). Flowers and chocolates still seem to be the most popular gifts, both for the main companion and the partner.
Love, in all its forms, is cause for celebration, and the consensus among most Ashley Madison members and respondents from the general population is clear. Down with the old and long live the new.
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